Ugh

This stuff that is going on at home is bringing up a lot of shit for me. I've been thinking about how I am starting to feel like I fit here a lot more than I fit at home. I don't like it, but I do sometimes. I just feel like it's happening by default. Like this semester I've been feeling it so much more, like that I belong here, not at home. And it makes me feel really sad. I think it has to do with this separation I've been feeling with Bri. Like I feel like we're both changing but we can't keep up with each other. I don't know. I just feel like there is a gap growing between us and I don't know how to deal with it. And worse, I sometimes don't know if I want to deal with it. I don't know. It's just not fun to think about. So I am gonna try and relax and just not go crazy about it.

But in other news, Portugal. The Man. Amazing. Obsession is an understatement. I want to live in their music. So yea, that plus beautiful weather has made my life pretty good recently. I just have been realizing how much I love it here. I feel like Iowa and I fit together nicely.